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Endless circlesI've been running in circles not knowing what to do
Searching yet scared to find a clue.
Getting nothing done just endless sailing
Trying yet giving up afraid of failing.
How many times have I ran away
Knowing yet petrified of what people would say?
I've tried countless of times to go on forward at a slow pace
Fighting yet frozen into place.
But where can I find the courage to keep on going
Without a twist or turn to were the river is flowing?
My mazeConfused feelings overwhelm me,
Yet I don't dare to ask for explanations.
As time goes by my thoughts begin to play,
Showing more and more possibilities
Good and bad, happy and sad,
Still I'm eager to know which one is correct.
Hoping time will show me the answers
Waiting for the pieces to play out.
Endless waiting, with no result,
Only giving me more questions .
My mind is a maze and I can't find the end,
This time consuming game is eating me from the inside
Though there are moments when I seem to free,
When I see a little logic in what I might be thinking.
And those moments get me through the day.
ForgetingI'm waiting, just waiting,
until my thoughts are fading,
into the starry sky,
time slowly passing by.
Faraway my thoughts will go,
and no one who will ever know,
that I was even gone,
though my silences are long...
Only few will see,
that at those times I'm not really me,
but please when you do, let me be,
because at those times I can't face reality...
Loving you from afarI love you from afar, because I'm afraid you would never love me back
My thoughts tell me someone else is more worthy of your love.
So I'll witness you falling in love with someone else.
Then at some point I'll move on and find someone else to admire from afar
And that's how it will ever go on.
LIFELife isn't always as hard as it may seem
Spread your arms, lift your head and just scream.
Now open your mind; let it be free.
Don't let life shape you, but shape life how you want it to be.
Mistakes are to learn from and then to move on.
Not to get caught up in and wish you were gone.
It's hard, it's cruel, it's beautiful,embrace it
I want to....I want to fly to a place unknown
I want to let my worries go
I want to be less shy
I want to touch the sky
I want to catch a star
I want to take your hand in mine
I want to make your wish come true
And that is all I want to do
Part 1Life is a rollercoaster it goes up and down and up and down, and again and again and again. I know. And when it all goes down, you need someone to pull you up. That happened to me, I thought I was all alone, but far away there was some kind of hope. Well not just any kind, it was Jasper who helped me. I never thought he could be so kind hearted, he came to me when no one would, he offered me help when all the others walked away. He's like a brother to me now, we tell each other everything, except secrets of others because those are not ours to tell, and we have a lot in common. No, we can't see each other as boyfriend and girlfriend, more as best friends or brother and sister. I don't know why, but that's how it is. A few weeks ago we had a sleepover at my house, just the two of us and his sister, Daisy. When Daisy left the room, he told me he was completely head over heels for a girl in our class. (Of course he told me who, but that's a secret to you.) At first I laughed, I
The colors on my blank canvasOn my pallet I have some white, yellow, red and blue, but I don't know what to make.
I'll paint my background yellow, because it's light and bright.
And on that yellow canvas I'll make a vase with red.
How about I mix some yellow with some red, I will use the orange in the vase for details.
And then I'll mix the yellow with the blue, the green I'll get will become stems for the flowers that I'll make.
Some purple I'll get by mixing blue with red, will become the flowers itself.
Then I'll use some white to make it all look more real.
The only thing I need to do now, is sign it and I'm done.
The beachI'm sitting on the beach, looking at the bright shining sun.
Getting sleepy by looking to long at the sparkling surface of the ocean.
Looking up once in a while to answer a question or say something completely meaningless.
Well, completely meaningless I wouldn't say, it has some sort of meaning of course.
Saying to myself that I think to much, but there is nothing that I can do about it.
Drifting off into my memories or thinking about what the future could have in store for me.
But then I remind myself to go back to what is now, because we're going back home.
Unable to loveMy love was pure
I only wanted
But my heart
Because my love
Like a piece of garbage
And now I'm unable
Because the shreds
Of my shattered soul
now i see the stars.there was a time when i
couldn't catch my breath whenever i
thought about you , (crippled lungs and-
boy, you hit me like an asteroid,
there's a crater on my chest now that I can't ever seem to fill,
oceans of my tears cried on
nights when you couldn't be there to sing me to sleep.
thirty two poemless days after you joined the constellations,
i walked out into the yard and howled to the empty sky,
for a moment i was Gaea, rivers running down my cheeks,
weighted to the ground and
buried in myself, but
where there is no light there are no shadows, and
sometimes, i wonder if i miss me.
yes, yes i do.
i may not see the moon, but
MathematicsI am but the sum of my
F L A W S;
a network of
S C A R S
a disaster of
D R E A M S
a shield of
B O N E S
C A L C U L A T I O N
a void of
to the girl i lose my words aroundi have been meaning to tell you for years:
i think you’re beautiful. i have
seen nothing on earth that holds a candle
to the ocean you carry inside your body.
it spills over your edges sometimes, like
a rain shower around you, blurring your penciled-in
lines until there is nothing left of you but your natural
cliffs, valleys, and deserts.
i like that.
i have never met someone who is, somehow,
a sea and a storm at the same time.
maybe i never will again.
maybe you are the only one
who gathers clouds on her forehead
like a promise, or feels the push and pull of the tide
with her every step.
you are beautiful, honestly.
you are honest, beautifully.
it is in the way you talk, the way you hold ice
on your tongue but forget to use it—
you always forget to use it, i don’t think
you know how.
to be truthful, i’m afraid of your smile
and how it breaks over me, how it pulls
me like a whirlpool down, how it pushes me
like a current back to the surface. i’m afraid of
i am made of nights like theseativan boy, you cannot empty out this skull -
not with a pen nor with a bullet. you can
be my hallowed head(case) for spitting out
words like teeth; oh, but i will only love you
when you're weary. i will keep crows caged
between your lungs like veins, like palpitations.
i will rot you through bones & car radios,
but i will never get (you) out of your skin.
Abuse Is Sometimes NecessaryPush and pull at her long hair, topple her to the solid ground,
elbow her sharply in the raw gut, shove her harshly around.
Scratch him in the pale face, punch him in the broken jaw,
do anything necessary to him that's considered breaking the law.
And when she cries because you've punched her, let her be,
and observe her when she returns to her habitual smoking.
When she passes out next day, because she's drunken too much booze,
slap her in the face once more, though many would consider it abuse.
When he can hardly walk because he thinks he's high in the clouds,
rip the needle out of his arm, and with your nails, slash him across the sweaty brow.
Grab them and shake them till their battered and bruised,
tear at their heart, scream in their ears until you've reached the point of verbal abuse.
And when she falls into your chest, and he collapses to the ground,
pull them closely, and whisper, “We can turn this all around.”
And rehab is a necessity for all of you, because you'v
ScienceI am more than my
F L A W S;
a masterpiece of
S C A R S
a delicacy of
D R E A M S
a sculpture of
B O N E S
R E A C T I O N
a well of
Good (Great, Greater, Greatest, You)Good (Great, Greater, Greatest, You)
I hope the title caught your eye,
because this is about you.
Many of us speak in superlatives
and ambiguous language.
In imagery-laden text masquerading
underneath double entendres
keeping us from a part of the truth.
But purple streaks and red bands,
harp strings and soft hands
don't begin to explain
the love I have for you.
So I lay these words down
simple in its vulnerability,
blemished and raw in its purity.
The term lissome fits you in many ways,
but not necessarily it its textbook form.
I speak on the part that is not readily seen
but what is easily most cogent.
Your consciousness' cognizance
is graceful in the way
you fold one syllable over
another, supple in its meaning
that can take many forms
going from idle lies
to how we idolize hollow eyes
and uncovered hip bones.
Elegance is an understatement,
but I refuse to speak in cliche superlatives.
I speak honestly
but not with exaggerated grandeur.
Because your immediate app
Memories.......My memories......Lost, broken and faded away.......
Time stands still.......Who am I?........What happened?.......Something's gone...
Can't remember........Someone Help ME!!!.........
The room is spinning.......A hand........A face.......Whose?.......
Frustration, agony and fear........
It stops........A hand, a face. Not mine......Who are you?.......
I can't remember........Do I know you?.....You smile.....
A touch.....You take my hand.......We walk away........
Safety, happiness and love.....
I smile back........With you I'll stay.....
Teenage TaoismGiving birth is the closest I’d ever felt to dying.
Before that, my near death experiences had consisted only of my silent announcement of pregnancy—silent, being that my social media accounts were all deleted almost simultaneously and I never returned to school in the fall, saying without really saying that I had caught the malicious disease of “teenage pregnancy”. I’m sure the whisper spread in the hallways like the Bubonic Plague. That September, sitting at home on what would have been the first day of my senior year, I imagined friends I’d never talk to again saying “she was only seventeen, and so full of life!” at my absence in the cafeteria tables, as if they were attending my funeral instead of talking about me behind my back.
"Full of life," I had snorted then, folding a never ending stream of what had once been my own baby clothes. "Literally."
I walked around like a zombie for the months of my pregnancy, deciding t
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