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Endless circlesI've been running in circles not knowing what to do
Searching yet scared to find a clue.
Getting nothing done just endless sailing
Trying yet giving up afraid of failing.
How many times have I ran away
Knowing yet petrified of what people would say?
I've tried countless of times to go on forward at a slow pace
Fighting yet frozen into place.
But where can I find the courage to keep on going
Without a twist or turn to were the river is flowing?
My mazeConfused feelings overwhelm me,
Yet I don't dare to ask for explanations.
As time goes by my thoughts begin to play,
Showing more and more possibilities
Good and bad, happy and sad,
Still I'm eager to know which one is correct.
Hoping time will show me the answers
Waiting for the pieces to play out.
Endless waiting, with no result,
Only giving me more questions .
My mind is a maze and I can't find the end,
This time consuming game is eating me from the inside
Though there are moments when I seem to free,
When I see a little logic in what I might be thinking.
And those moments get me through the day.
ForgetingI'm waiting, just waiting,
until my thoughts are fading,
into the starry sky,
time slowly passing by.
Faraway my thoughts will go,
and no one who will ever know,
that I was even gone,
though my silences are long...
Only few will see,
that at those times I'm not really me,
but please when you do, let me be,
because at those times I can't face reality...
Loving you from afarI love you from afar, because I'm afraid you would never love me back
My thoughts tell me someone else is more worthy of your love.
So I'll witness you falling in love with someone else.
Then at some point I'll move on and find someone else to admire from afar
And that's how it will ever go on.
LIFELife isn't always as hard as it may seem
Spread your arms, lift your head and just scream.
Now open your mind; let it be free.
Don't let life shape you, but shape life how you want it to be.
Mistakes are to learn from and then to move on.
Not to get caught up in and wish you were gone.
It's hard, it's cruel, it's beautiful,embrace it
I want to....I want to fly to a place unknown
I want to let my worries go
I want to be less shy
I want to touch the sky
I want to catch a star
I want to take your hand in mine
I want to make your wish come true
And that is all I want to do
Part 1Life is a rollercoaster it goes up and down and up and down, and again and again and again. I know. And when it all goes down, you need someone to pull you up. That happened to me, I thought I was all alone, but far away there was some kind of hope. Well not just any kind, it was Jasper who helped me. I never thought he could be so kind hearted, he came to me when no one would, he offered me help when all the others walked away. He's like a brother to me now, we tell each other everything, except secrets of others because those are not ours to tell, and we have a lot in common. No, we can't see each other as boyfriend and girlfriend, more as best friends or brother and sister. I don't know why, but that's how it is. A few weeks ago we had a sleepover at my house, just the two of us and his sister, Daisy. When Daisy left the room, he told me he was completely head over heels for a girl in our class. (Of course he told me who, but that's a secret to you.) At first I laughed, I
The colors on my blank canvasOn my pallet I have some white, yellow, red and blue, but I don't know what to make.
I'll paint my background yellow, because it's light and bright.
And on that yellow canvas I'll make a vase with red.
How about I mix some yellow with some red, I will use the orange in the vase for details.
And then I'll mix the yellow with the blue, the green I'll get will become stems for the flowers that I'll make.
Some purple I'll get by mixing blue with red, will become the flowers itself.
Then I'll use some white to make it all look more real.
The only thing I need to do now, is sign it and I'm done.
The beachI'm sitting on the beach, looking at the bright shining sun.
Getting sleepy by looking to long at the sparkling surface of the ocean.
Looking up once in a while to answer a question or say something completely meaningless.
Well, completely meaningless I wouldn't say, it has some sort of meaning of course.
Saying to myself that I think to much, but there is nothing that I can do about it.
Drifting off into my memories or thinking about what the future could have in store for me.
But then I remind myself to go back to what is now, because we're going back home.
How to be Populardon’t talk
go to parties
listen to friends
go with the flow
drink some more
don’t let them see the tears
as you cry yourself to sleep
for the most important thing
is to be popular
i'm not going to lie and say she was perfect.her skin was spotted with what she passed off as freckles,
but what were really scars from a thousand summer suns
as she ran about outside,
climbing trees and treading rivers,
pretending to be an american bomber
in the midst of WWII.
she kept crimson stains on pearl pink lips,
which always had the habit of getting on her teeth
because she put on make-up after dressing in her car
and ordering coffee in every way she hated it
as she drove to the record store three times a day,
ignoring her job downtown.
she owned four and a half hairbrushes exactly,
i took count on the first night i stepped into that whirl-wind room,
though her lopsided up-dos of messy blonde hair revealed just how much her fingers
never broke the dust.
she had these lovely fragile hands
that showed each and every vein and bone,
the type of hands made for tearing boys like me apart.
how could i have even expected to survive,
a paper poet
held against a reckless flame?
Panic attackIt hits me like a wave,
These thoughts of fear and regret.
They swarm all around me,
Trapping me inside my own head.
Pretty soon, I am suffocating,
Please someone save me!
My heart beat races,
As does the thoughts that pick up the pace.
Of sending me memories I've kept and buried so long inside.
They've come back to haunt me tonight.
And as soon as it came,
It was gone,
Leaving me here.
And what was left of me,
The sound of silenceThe sound of silence,
Is so deafening,
That it makes my ears ring,
With the cacophony of my own insanity.
Being afraid to speakThe unpleasantries of past events
Were driven by the voices of contempt
Leaving me breathless
To that effect, I was left senseless
And when I laid under the covers
As I tried to warm myself from the cold stares
I shiver, as my skin turned white
By the solace of silence
But, as I overcame their sadness
I learned to embrace the cold
Until I was able to give warmth to others
Ideationlocked in a room
with only one escape,
or so it seems.
your hands shake and you drop the key.
Suddenly you're unsure.
Do I want to pick it up?
Do I want to find it?
Do I want to leave?
you think to yourself
there's no other choice.
find the key or corrode, or rust
wear down the hinge
use sadness as the key.
You have the answer now.
Just open the door.
Just walk outside and don't look back.
Let yourself leave with no regrets.
And yet you can't.
You're afraid, you think,
but you are actually strong.
Don't run away.
Don't take that leap.
DNAyou are content
because every day
you have the opportunity to
hug both sets of your DNA.
however, i am not content.
half of me is missing
and the other half
is hardly ever here.
Memories.......My memories......Lost, broken and faded away.......
Time stands still.......Who am I?........What happened?.......Something's gone...
Can't remember........Someone Help ME!!!.........
The room is spinning.......A hand........A face.......Whose?.......
Frustration, agony and fear........
It stops........A hand, a face. Not mine......Who are you?.......
I can't remember........Do I know you?.....You smile.....
A touch.....You take my hand.......We walk away........
Safety, happiness and love.....
I smile back........With you I'll stay.....
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More